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Vivre le moment.

Future with you, N.

Wow.. what a day. I never felt so alone. I mean i’m surrounded by so many people and I still feel so alone. Because none of them are you. It’s not the same. I mean there are so many pretty boys out there. But I honestly don’t care. They are just guys.. Well my Love there are days in which I’m doing good. These days in which my mind is positive. But there are also days in which I break. And today was one of them. It’s so hard to describe what I feel right now. Do you remember me asking you of your fears ? I told you my biggest fear would be losing you. And it still is. I can’t imagine a life without you. Everyday I’d go through the world thinking “I am not completed.” Because you’re the one who makes my life complete. I told you I was afraid of falling in love again. But after all I know love is worth it. You are worth it. There were moments in which I wanted to end my life. And I’ve been through a lot. But whatever I’ve been through I know losing you would be the worst pain. You have no Idea how much I do love you. I never loved so much. It kind of hurts. Sometimes I think it’s all my fault that it’s so difficult right now. I care so much, maybe too much. There is no day you’re not in my mind. When I was with you, I was the happiest girl on earth. And you don’t know but I changed a lot. Before we met I was an other person. I was emotional overdosed and depressed. When I was with you, I was dancing and laughing so much. I even sang under the shower. And I know we’re so young. Normally we should be fucking around with so many people. But I am looking for something different. And than our ways were crossing. When we first met I had no idea you would be so important to me. I feel like you’re the one I’ve been looking for. I opened my heart for you, as you did for me. There is so much I want to tell you but I don’t know how. You’re my biggest streigh and my biggest weakness. Love is a risk but it’s worth it. Right now distance tears us apart but our love gives me hope and power. We can do it, can’t we ? I’ll fight for us as long as you don’t give up on us. It’s just one year. After it we’re done with school and we’re both 18. I’ll come over and I’d love to take a job in your destination so we can finally live together. You’re my dream and I’d share everything with you. Even my chocolate cookies which means a lot. What do you think ? Can we do that ? I would. What about you ? -Love , always A.



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